Bill and I celebrated 32 years of marriage to one another, last January! God is so good! I can still say that I am happy and glad to be married to Bill! We met at Baylor our freshman year. We were good friends until our senior year when we started dating and after our first date we never went out with anyone else! We were engaged within 5 months after dating! I actually had a list of what I wanted and prayed for one day in a husband and yes, he met everything on my list! His strengths fill in my weaknesses and vice a versa! He is good at math, good with money, very athletic, very punctual and always on time or early as well as very driven and intrinsically motivated! He is a visionary, give him a task and he will not only complete it but exceed your expectations, every time! He is loyal, he is an excellent provider and protector, and he is kind, giving, and strong, both physically and mentally. Bill is extremely conscientious and excellent with budgets, numbers, and data. He can do all kinds of analysis effectively and efficiently. I consider myself very blessed to get to spend the rest of my life with this marvelous man!
We co-counseling couples that Bill is preparing for their marriage ceremony. This facilitates having both a male and female perspective when discussing the realities and challenges of married life. We love sharing this special time with precious couples and we always teach them the needs of men and the needs of women.
Men need: Admiration, Appreciation, and Affection, lots of Affection!
Women need: Security and Self Esteem.
It really is that simple! I know, I know, you are asking, "Really?" Yes! Really!
Try it, ladies, stop criticizing your man for one week, only praise him, (admiration), thank him, (appreciation), and meet his needs for Affection XOXOXOX. See what happens! I promise you, he will be the man of your dreams and it's free! It costs you no money, you have all you need ladies to do these three things for the man you love! Try it, let me know what the results are! Then you have to keep it up! I promise, after one week of doing this and NO CRITICISM, you will want to keep it up and it will be easy!
Ladies, if you want to do even more than just what your man needs, be sure and feed him well and often too! Then don't forget to ask him to exercise with you and then praise him when he does it!
Men do respond to good food from the woman they love as you show him that you want to nurture him, feed him, and satisfy him.
Men, be sure you express to you woman, wife, and/or lady, that SHE is the most beautiful woman in the room, in your eyes, always! Tell her over and over, never stop. The majority of women, no matter how beautiful, suffer from low self esteem, believe me. The number of women who have shared with me how low their self concept is astounds me, after all, God made us "wonderfully" and even when you read the scriptures to ladies about how God made them exactly as they are and for a purpose, the majority of ladies struggle with believing it and applying it to themselves.
Reassure and show your woman that you will provide for her and protect her. Show her over and over that you will never leave her, no matter what you face together (aging, illness, financial struggles, difficulties that life brings), you will stay the course, you will finish the race, together.
Bill demonstrated to me that he would finish this half marathon beside me and I'll never forget it! He could have run ahead and crossed the finish line way ahead of me but he didn't! He stayed by my side, encouraging me, praising me, coaching me, and we finished the race, together!
Take time away to refresh, recharge, relax, and recreate together! Cultivate common interest. When I married Bill I didn't know how to snow ski, golf, or snorkel. Well, he loves to do these things and now I do too! I overcame some fears to cultivate "common interests". He as well learned to shop, walk the mall and "play all 18 holes" of the mall! He learned to enjoy Musicals at the theater and he even learned how to play Bunco and watch chick flicks with me!
Ephesians 5:28 says, "So ought men to love wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself."
Ecclesiastes 9:9 says, "Love joyfully with the wife whom thou loves all the days of the life…"
Proverbs 19:14 "…a prudent wife is from the Lord."
Proverbs 18:22 "Whoso findeth a wife fineth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord."
My prayer for you is for God to bless your marriage with joy, fun, marvelous memories, and hope for a joyful future for you and yours!
(Sadly, one thing I do have to add here is this, if a woman or a man is being physically or emotionally abused, tell a trusted person, do not continue to allow this, and get help. Spousal abuse is NEVER acceptable, NEVER. Sometimes help can facilitate a change, healing, and restoration but if you are being abused, if you are afraid, speak out, get away and get help.)
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