Have you ever been in a prison of bitterness and/or unforgiveness? Here is what I learned a few years back that helped me get out of that awful mindset and not ever get stuck back there.
Matthew 6:14 says, " If you forgive others for their sins, your Father in heaven will also forgive you for your sins." July 5th, 2006 this was the verse in my daily devotional reading in "Grace for the Moment" by Max Lucado. Max said in that reading that I could choose to chain myself to my hurt ... or I could choose to put away my hurts before they became hates... This started that day by getting my attention on a topic I was struggling with. Then that very night at Church Choir practice our director of Music shared a devotion that was on his heart. He quoted Colossians 3:13, " Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievance you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Choir members discussed this briefly and one of my close friends shared that she heard that carrying around unforgiveness was like drinking poison and then hoping that the person you refuse to forgive gets poisoned. I had an aha moment. I realized that was what I was doing.
The next morning I opened my devotion book and guess what the topic was! Yes, "Forgiveness, The Gift that Keeps on Giving"! As I began reading the attached scripture, " As far as the east is from the west, so far hath He removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12
It went on to say, forgiveness is the act of pardoning another in spite of his or her errors, shortcomings, or wrong actions. God forgives sin. He is a God of grace and pardon who sent His own Son, Jesus Christ, to die for all humankind. Christ in His death and resurrection triumphed over sin. To be forgiven is to be identified with Christ in full victory of His Crucifixion and Resurrection. His forgiveness is complete. God promises if you confess He is faithful and just and will forgive your sins.
In the Lord's Prayer, you ask God to "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." though we are commanded to forgive other as we have been forgiven, sometimes we may have trouble moving from intellectual assent into true forgiveness. A friend can let you down, you can be a victim of crime or violence, or someone may betray your trust. It is hard to forgive when you are hurt.
When it is difficult to forgive, we have to come to God and ask for the ability to forgive. He will supernaturally give us what we ask him for in Jesus name and within His will. This kind of forgiveness becomes a healing gift. Forgiveness releases God to work in a situation and transform it. As long as forgiveness is resisted you stay locked in the same situation - one adversary facing another, waiting for someone to acknowledge wrongdoing. Forgiveness is an act of pardon. Forgiveness facilitates reconciliation and transformation turning a negative situation into an opportunity for positive change. Making a choice to forgive, even if the perpetrator doesn't ask for it nor deserve it, can release you from the cycle of anger, bitterness, wrongdoing, even sickness and elevated blood pressure! Forgiveness issued by you can free you from the psychological control you are giving to that other person over you. The other person may not even be aware of how you are feeling and have forgotten and moved on while you are still stewing in your anger. Choosing to forgive is a tremendous step toward breaking the chain of pain and entering into freedom.
Patsy Clairmont, at Women of Faith caught my attention when she said, "Forgiveness is a process and it comes off in layers". Yes! I could relate! When I was struggling through a particularly hurtful time and having to choose to issue forgiveness, it would tend to creep back up and I had to daily reissue that forgiveness. Like Patsy said, it came off in layers, every day it got easier and easier to say out loud again, "I choose to forgive" until one day it didn't creep back up and I was truly past it! Yes, we are human, and yes, we can forgive but we do have a memory, and we can't forget like God does. He is divine and He promises that once He has forgiven us, it is as far from His mind as the east is from the west! Isn't that just amazing! He remembers it no more! Wow! How wonderful! I wish I could do that.
I Corinthians 13:5 says, "Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do." Lord, give me that kind of Love!
Matthew 5:7 " Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."
That is my prayer, "Lord, give me your love and mercy for others. In my humanness, I cannot love, forgive, or be merciful, only through your gift of these characteristics to me and through me. Instill me with the traits I need to bring glory to you Lord. Without you, I am nothing. "
Things to do:
Go to someone you have offended and ask forgiveness.
Forgive someone you have been holding a grudge against.
Pray a silent prayer for peace, love, and wholeness for our country.
Send a thank you note to someone who helped or forgave you.
Let someone cut ahead of you in the line at the store or in traffic.
Make an appointment and talk to a counselor or your pastor if you are struggling with guilt, anger, and grief caused by the hurtful acts of others.
Matthew 6:14 says, " If you forgive others for their sins, your Father in heaven will also forgive you for your sins." July 5th, 2006 this was the verse in my daily devotional reading in "Grace for the Moment" by Max Lucado. Max said in that reading that I could choose to chain myself to my hurt ... or I could choose to put away my hurts before they became hates... This started that day by getting my attention on a topic I was struggling with. Then that very night at Church Choir practice our director of Music shared a devotion that was on his heart. He quoted Colossians 3:13, " Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievance you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Choir members discussed this briefly and one of my close friends shared that she heard that carrying around unforgiveness was like drinking poison and then hoping that the person you refuse to forgive gets poisoned. I had an aha moment. I realized that was what I was doing.
The next morning I opened my devotion book and guess what the topic was! Yes, "Forgiveness, The Gift that Keeps on Giving"! As I began reading the attached scripture, " As far as the east is from the west, so far hath He removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12
It went on to say, forgiveness is the act of pardoning another in spite of his or her errors, shortcomings, or wrong actions. God forgives sin. He is a God of grace and pardon who sent His own Son, Jesus Christ, to die for all humankind. Christ in His death and resurrection triumphed over sin. To be forgiven is to be identified with Christ in full victory of His Crucifixion and Resurrection. His forgiveness is complete. God promises if you confess He is faithful and just and will forgive your sins.
In the Lord's Prayer, you ask God to "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." though we are commanded to forgive other as we have been forgiven, sometimes we may have trouble moving from intellectual assent into true forgiveness. A friend can let you down, you can be a victim of crime or violence, or someone may betray your trust. It is hard to forgive when you are hurt.
When it is difficult to forgive, we have to come to God and ask for the ability to forgive. He will supernaturally give us what we ask him for in Jesus name and within His will. This kind of forgiveness becomes a healing gift. Forgiveness releases God to work in a situation and transform it. As long as forgiveness is resisted you stay locked in the same situation - one adversary facing another, waiting for someone to acknowledge wrongdoing. Forgiveness is an act of pardon. Forgiveness facilitates reconciliation and transformation turning a negative situation into an opportunity for positive change. Making a choice to forgive, even if the perpetrator doesn't ask for it nor deserve it, can release you from the cycle of anger, bitterness, wrongdoing, even sickness and elevated blood pressure! Forgiveness issued by you can free you from the psychological control you are giving to that other person over you. The other person may not even be aware of how you are feeling and have forgotten and moved on while you are still stewing in your anger. Choosing to forgive is a tremendous step toward breaking the chain of pain and entering into freedom.
Patsy Clairmont, at Women of Faith caught my attention when she said, "Forgiveness is a process and it comes off in layers". Yes! I could relate! When I was struggling through a particularly hurtful time and having to choose to issue forgiveness, it would tend to creep back up and I had to daily reissue that forgiveness. Like Patsy said, it came off in layers, every day it got easier and easier to say out loud again, "I choose to forgive" until one day it didn't creep back up and I was truly past it! Yes, we are human, and yes, we can forgive but we do have a memory, and we can't forget like God does. He is divine and He promises that once He has forgiven us, it is as far from His mind as the east is from the west! Isn't that just amazing! He remembers it no more! Wow! How wonderful! I wish I could do that.
I Corinthians 13:5 says, "Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do." Lord, give me that kind of Love!
Matthew 5:7 " Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."
That is my prayer, "Lord, give me your love and mercy for others. In my humanness, I cannot love, forgive, or be merciful, only through your gift of these characteristics to me and through me. Instill me with the traits I need to bring glory to you Lord. Without you, I am nothing. "
Things to do:
Go to someone you have offended and ask forgiveness.
Forgive someone you have been holding a grudge against.
Pray a silent prayer for peace, love, and wholeness for our country.
Send a thank you note to someone who helped or forgave you.
Let someone cut ahead of you in the line at the store or in traffic.
Make an appointment and talk to a counselor or your pastor if you are struggling with guilt, anger, and grief caused by the hurtful acts of others.
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